A man dies and arrives at the gates of hell, where he is greeted by the devil himself for orientation. Contrary to his expectations, there are no infernal fires or scary monsters — the whole place is very modernly designed and well-organised.
“Oh, we got rid of that medieval crap a long time ago,” the devil tells him. “We don’t need that stuff for eternal damnation.”
He then explains to the man the way that it works in hell is that all newbies have to pick a room where they will have to spend the rest of eternity, and that currently there are three rooms available to choose from.
The first room that they visit is filled with people doing headstands, with the floor covered in tiny Lego bricks. They’re all red in the face and screaming in pain because the more they move, the more their hands and head are prickled with the tiny Lego bricks.
This doesn’t seem too bad, the man thinks.
They then move to the second room, where it’s also full of people doing headstands, but this time the floor is covered in cockroaches, worms and other disgusting insects. All of the people in the room are red in the face and screaming in fear because they don’t want these insects to crawl onto their hands and faces.
This is bad, but it could be worse, the man remarks to himself.
Then they head to the third and final room, where it’s full of people standing around drinking coffee but knee deep in shit. It smells horrible but these men seem to be having an enjoyable time compared to the people in the first two rooms.
“So, which room are you going to pick?” the devil asks.
“I’ll pick room three,” the man replies.
“That’s a good choice,” the devil says, ushering him into the room.
As the door closes, he hears the words: “Alright lads, coffee break’s over! Time to get back on your heads...”
