On Christmas Eve of 2020 I had a big emotional breakdown.
It was a huge avalanche of trauma from past experiences, specifically my marriage, and feelings that weren’t properly processed and dealt with over the years finally making me crumble.
Imagine bullet proof glass being shot at repeatedly until finally...
I’m no stranger to venting and talking things out with close friends about fall outs with people, marital problems, music industry let downs etc. but in relation to the traumatic events that happened to me? I didn’t see them as something to dwell on to long. I thought it was just “how life went” and often concluded those traumatic moments as the infamous saying goes “it is what it is”.
However, that emotional breakdown pushed me to not only pursue therapy but it also taught me a lesson in FEELing & properly dealing with my emotions. Days, weeks, and even a month later, I would still cry about what happened that Christmas Eve. That wasn’t my usual self as I was usually able to “deal “with my emotions in a day or two and keep moving. I didn’t realize I was numb to the emotional abuse for so long, it had finally pierced through the armor I had built up for so long.
I felt weak, broken, low and deeply hurt. But through my healing process, sorting through my emotions and embracing my feelings instead of trying to bury the pain, I found the beautiful things and lessons that would help me grow. The beautiful things that would help me keep my cup full.
And so, I began to make the music, write, record and this is what was came forth.
I’ve always believed vulnerability was a strength but now I’m stronger than ever…
I'm gold fanged & flowerful
